My son has had some real behavior issues lately. It's not that he's mean or hurtful, but more that he cannot sit still or put a stop to his OCD tendencies. It breaks my heart because I love him to death and the last thing I want is for my son to be at a disadvantage in this ridiculous, competitive world. My fear is that this inability will negatively affect his growth and development. I want him to make good social connections. I want him to 'get' the bigger picture. I want him to stay out of trouble.
Now I fully understand the perpetual look of fear that used to be in my mother's
eyes.
He's been in speech therapy for quite awhile. At age five, he is at a 2nd Grade reading level at the very least, if not higher, and he's not even begun Kindergarten yet. The mind of this boy is just never satisfied though. Hands are always twitching, legs are always moving, mouth is always talking. Then he looks up, and reads to us from a paper he wrote on. "I love my Mommy and Daddy and Ian!" and then says "Mommy, you're the prettiest girl in the whole world!" followed up by a big, generous hug that only a child could give. Needless to say, I would die for this amazing kid.
Abrupt transition of topics.
Last Friday I had a performance that went really well, better than expected. Even if it wasn't a large crowd I still felt great doing it. It's probably cliche, but I think that I have the spirit of an entertainer. There is this craving in me to be on that stage and get a reaction from people. It's not just the claps either! The mass connection with others is the nourishing food for my soul. As anxious and depressed as I get at times, performing in front of people feels so right, as if I've finally found the exact place I'm supposed to be at. It's therapeutic. It's cathartic. It's wonderful. Perhaps in a previous life I was a prolific public speaker?
It could be the praise...to be told "You are above adequate and your art is meaningful." That would be nice.
I love the pictures along with this entry. Your art is amazing and you are more than adequate. :)
ReplyDeleteAw thank you! I very much appreciate that! (even if I did pretty much solicit it lol!)
ReplyDeleteWe do need to hang out soon, has been awhile!
I'm glad you're so invested in your child. I can't tell you how very very frustrating it was for me to work in a public school system and see parents expecting the teachers to do the parenting.
ReplyDeleteBoys are SO much more active than girls at that age. Get him involved in a physical activity with some team building skills - t ball? wee gym? Something like that. Tire him out!